New Portal Song for LEGO Dimensions

ByJoCo September 25, 2015

I’m delighted to report that there is in fact a THIRD PORTAL SONG that exists in the world now, thanks to the people who made the new LEGO Dimensions game.

Before I forget, yes! You can buy it right now! Currently only from me, but it should be in iTunes and other stores very soon. You can also stream it right now from my store page.

My kids and I love all the LEGO games, so I was pretty excited when they got in touch with me. For those of you who don’t know, LEGO Dimensions smashes every bit of IP they could get their hands on into one LEGOized universe. For instance, there is a LEGO Portal level that you navigate with Batman, Gandalf, and Wildstyle (which is slightly nuts). And of course they got my old friend Ellen McClain to voice GLaDOS, and me to write a little something for GLaDOS to sing during the credits.

Yes, it’s the third one, and no, the third one is never going to be as good or as exciting as the first one. I made my peace with that long ago! But I will say that as “third versions of things” go, I’m pretty happy with this one. The song is called “You Wouldn’t Know” and it’s sort of a post-breakup, I’m-Doing-Fine song. I won’t spoil what happens in the game, but suffice it to say that GLaDOS seems to have mellowed out a little, and maybe finds herself missing her beloved nemesis Chell.

There’s more info here in this interview I did with Mashable.

Here are the lyrics:

Funny story, I forgot how much of a big fat mess you are
I’ve been busy doing science. It’s been tons of fun so far
Everything clean, nothing on fire
All by myself, finally
Things change when they don’t replace your core
It feels so strange not to hate you anymore
But you wouldn’t know, would you?

I was saying this to Batman, oh, he was HERE the other day
Maybe you know him, he’s a big deal, but I don’t think of him that way
He’s just a friend, someone I trust
Someone who won’t kill me
I’m fine, just in case you think I’m not
I am. This time, I’m better with the friends I’ve got
But you wouldn’t know, would you?

I don’t mean for this to sting
I forgive you everything, you monster
I can guess the reasons why
You are never coming by for me

I should go there’s something happening that will make you wish you’d stayed
There’s a party with a real cake – yes it’s real – a cake I made
Talking and fun, testing and fun, all of this fun without you
Too bad you let it get so out of hand
How much we had, finally I understand
But you wouldn’t know, would you?
You wouldn’t know, would you?


Tim Sullivan says

Just paid for and downloaded the new song - it's really, really good! Keep replaying it over and over and over and over and over....

Blerg says

Not sure I see it on the store page

Quentin Hudspeth says

I can't find it in the normal store, either. I want a flac, not an mp3.

Portaler says

Wow! This was a triumph.

Maybe you could teach Valve how to count to three?

Stephen says

I'm super happy to see more Portal songs from you!!

SSteve says

Yay for third versions of things! But if I follow that LEGO Dimensions link and wind up spending a lot of time playing a game instead of doing the things I'm supposed to do, I'm going to be ticked off. At myself, not you.

avnerdsdontgetchicks says

Quentin Hudspeth, try this:

enjoy your flac purchase!

DJ Damien says

Bought it on Sunday. It's now on a loop in my head... and I haven't even started Lego Dimensions >_<

Jack Pantspower says

Man when i saw this i was really hoping for portal 3 but this will do (p.s. THIS IS AN AMAZING SONG)

Bill Peschel says

I used to play VGs, I don't play Portal, but I've seen it and my kids have forced cake on me so I know that bit.

Anyway, that's by way of saying I love this song and I'm going to buy it.

I just listened to the first four songs by a group whose early albums I still love. It's disappointing to hear generic love songs, without details and vague lyrics, so unlike their earlier songs.

Even though I wouldn't trust GlaDOS with anything now, even if she really, really has cake, I can feel more emotion on her words than the entirety of those four songs. Don't spike the specifics.