Ruined Again
The rumors and the gossip: all true. On Friday I became a father for a second time, and since then have been living in a haze of fragmented sleep, visits from extended family, and teeny tiny diapers. It’s a boy – he’s very small, put together like a wrinkly old man, and looks extremely concerned about something most of the time. Everybody’s happy and healthy. He’s really good at Rockband.
I’m not exactly sure what kind of paternity leave is going to happen, it’s always hard to really create time off when you don’t go anywhere for work. But for the next few weeks at least I’m going to do my best to take it easy and spend time with the family. No shows are scheduled till the end of October and it’s likely to stay that way. I will probably still twitter and blog because neither of those things really feels like work anymore, but if I’m a little slow getting back to you about stuff I hope you’ll understand.
The exception to all this is the Obama benefit comedy night I’m playing this very evening, The Audacity of Jokes, which was scheduled before this baby was supposed to arrive. This either makes me a dedicated professional or an irresponsible father. But hey, three days was good enough for Sarah Palin, right?
September 15th, 2008 at 12:03 pm
Congratulations!
September 15th, 2008 at 12:10 pm
Many congratulations to you and your family! Hopefully this doesn’t inspire you to leave musicianship and start another career you’ve been dreaming about (like woodworking, or something).
September 15th, 2008 at 12:11 pm
Very nice! Congrats to you and your family and glad to hear all is well.
September 15th, 2008 at 12:11 pm
Congrats, Jonathan!
Be careful changing baby boy the diapers….
They can fire without warning.
September 15th, 2008 at 12:32 pm
Congratulations! That is very, very exciting!
September 15th, 2008 at 12:38 pm
As I said before congratulations to you and the whole Coulton family. I assume you aren’t related to any of the no-u “Colton”’s including the likes of Scott Colton, apparently a professional wrestler and apparently Jewish – neither of which you are, I assume.
If my opinion mattered on the subject, I would say blogging is still work, while twittering, which is minimal blogging is still ok, assuming you have an actual keyboard, and aren’t like text messaging them. Actually, I take that back – I know some people who can text message with quite a large amount of proficiency…..
But I digress.
Congratulations, again.
Linus Torvalds, the original creator of the Linux kernel famously said “Talk is cheap, show me the code.” well in that same vain I say, uhh… “Photos?” I mean if you want, obviously. No one would want to pressure you to do something you wouldn’t have done normally……..
Roman
September 15th, 2008 at 12:43 pm
Big Congrats to you sir! That’s wonderful news! *hugs* to your whole family!
September 15th, 2008 at 12:54 pm
Congratulations. I’m sure he will soon have more stuffed animals than you can imagine.
September 15th, 2008 at 1:01 pm
Congrats!
September 15th, 2008 at 1:06 pm
All I can say is congrats!
Just don’t get your baby high
September 15th, 2008 at 1:13 pm
Congratulations! I hope you’re planning to make onesies of the new tour shirts for him…
September 15th, 2008 at 1:13 pm
Congrats on JoCo2.0
September 15th, 2008 at 1:13 pm
Congratulations, Jonathan! Fatherhood is great the 2nd time, too!
My baby son Clark (8 months old) says:
vb ccf df dfrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrdbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbb
September 15th, 2008 at 1:23 pm
Oh, congratulations!! That’s lovely news!!
September 15th, 2008 at 1:31 pm
Congrats, man! I’ve got three boys of my own, and I tell you, then only thing better than the birth of your first child is the second and third (if you dare!!!).
September 15th, 2008 at 1:33 pm
Congratulations!
September 15th, 2008 at 1:34 pm
Félicitations! Health and Happiness to you and your family.
May you each find what you are looking for.
September 15th, 2008 at 1:41 pm
Congratulations, and my deepest sympathies!
September 15th, 2008 at 1:48 pm
Whoohoo! How awesome for you, daddy-o!
I may have done research into reproduction, but you have the practical applications down to a science 
September 15th, 2008 at 1:51 pm
Congrats!
September 15th, 2008 at 2:00 pm
Awesome, man! May the child live long and prosper.
September 15th, 2008 at 2:05 pm
Congratulations! Enjoy as much time with your expanding family as you can!
September 15th, 2008 at 2:07 pm
Huge congrats and all the geek love in the world! I highly recommend having the girl first and the boy second, as that is what happened to me (like I could control it!) and know you will be in a haze of sleep-deprived bliss-agony for quite a while.
Please let Mrs. Coulton know we are thinking about her at our house too, and hope she and the little guy are doing well!
Hugs and kisses from Susie & the geeklings
September 15th, 2008 at 2:14 pm
Congrats dude! Wish I could go to the Dublin gig!
September 15th, 2008 at 2:18 pm
YAY!
September 15th, 2008 at 2:29 pm
Congratulations! I want to hear a lullaby version of “Re: Your Brains” next.
September 15th, 2008 at 2:34 pm
Congratulations to you and Mrs. JoCo!
September 15th, 2008 at 2:35 pm
Congratulations!!!
September 15th, 2008 at 2:46 pm
2x combo! Gratz!
September 15th, 2008 at 2:47 pm
Congrats. on the growing family. I was skeptical when I first met Dr. Martin, but you can’t argue with success.
September 15th, 2008 at 2:48 pm
Congrats JoCo and (now-bigger) family!
@ Andy Baio, holy cow, your comment was weird to read… just *yesterday* for laughs I sat down and played a soft fingerpicked take on that tune, though I thought of it as “Re: Your Brains, the Iron & Wine version” rather than a lullaby.
September 15th, 2008 at 2:48 pm
Congrats on the 2.1 spawn update!
September 15th, 2008 at 2:57 pm
All the best to the whole family. And maybe Paul and Storm’s rendition of “A better version of you” the next time you play a show with them.
September 15th, 2008 at 2:58 pm
Congratulations!
September 15th, 2008 at 3:01 pm
Congratulations indeed! And I second Lex’s comment (don’t even wash it with opium soap.)
Encubed, I think we decided that only applied to having daughters, so Jeff MacDougall has to become a full-time musician, but JoCo doesn’t have to become a sand sculptor.
September 15th, 2008 at 3:10 pm
Oh, awesome! Many congratulations! x
September 15th, 2008 at 3:28 pm
Lovely news….congrats and all that goes with it!!
September 15th, 2008 at 3:36 pm
Wishing you clean diapers and lots of sleep! — Lynette / NJ
September 15th, 2008 at 3:58 pm
Rock out, JoCo! Congrats!
“You Ruined Everything” is still one of my favs of yours, so I look forward to the hopefully eventual song written for this newest member of your family.
September 15th, 2008 at 4:05 pm
Congratulations to Mr. Coulton and family!
September 15th, 2008 at 4:05 pm
Congrats! Your first child obviously must be going through a rather abrupt upheaval. To ease his/her concerns, Paul and Storm have a great song to explain the transition: “A Better Version of You”.
September 15th, 2008 at 4:24 pm
Oh my! I didn’t even know your wife was pregnant! Congrats Jonathan, and tell your wife to take it easy
September 15th, 2008 at 4:25 pm
Also, out of curiosity, what is his name?
September 15th, 2008 at 4:39 pm
Congratulations! And: Who needs sleep? It’s totaly overrated…
September 15th, 2008 at 4:59 pm
Congrats to JoCo & wife!
September 15th, 2008 at 4:59 pm
Congrats on the kidlet, now you can look forward to no sleep, anxiety and more stress than is healthy all over again.
September 15th, 2008 at 5:12 pm
HOORAY! Congrats!
I bet Big Sister needs her own version of “You Ruined Everything” now.
September 15th, 2008 at 5:24 pm
Congrats!
I’ll play “A Better Version of You” by P&S tonight!
September 15th, 2008 at 5:47 pm
Add another one to the congratulations from all of us here at Radio KoL
September 15th, 2008 at 6:21 pm
You going to write a sequel song?
Both kids need their own song now…
September 15th, 2008 at 6:22 pm
Congrats!
September 15th, 2008 at 6:29 pm
Congratulations on spawning again!
September 15th, 2008 at 6:33 pm
Congratulations on the bouncing baby boy!
September 15th, 2008 at 6:42 pm
congrats!!!!!!
September 15th, 2008 at 7:12 pm
Congratulations!
September 15th, 2008 at 7:23 pm
Congrats! Best wishes.
The fatal robot wishes you all the best too.
September 15th, 2008 at 7:37 pm
Congratulations to you and Mrs. Coulton!!!
This is a valid excuse for not coming back to Mpls in the near future!
~Sharon
September 15th, 2008 at 7:49 pm
Congrats! Just make sure the new one picks up guitar ASAP.
September 15th, 2008 at 7:51 pm
Congrats! Are you going to commemorate this wonderful event with another song?
September 15th, 2008 at 8:18 pm
Congratulations! Papa Coulton!!!
September 15th, 2008 at 8:19 pm
Congratulations JoCo, good luck with the new kid and all.
September 15th, 2008 at 8:31 pm
Congrats!
September 15th, 2008 at 8:38 pm
Mazel tov!!
September 15th, 2008 at 8:51 pm
Congrats! That’s wonderful.
Where do we send the flowers?
September 15th, 2008 at 9:00 pm
Squee! Many congratulations to the Coulton family! How very exciting!!! ^_^
I hope you have one of the Re Your Brains bibs or onesies for him!
Very best wishes to you all! It’s lovely that you can be around and take some time out from your rigorous life of Internet Superstardom to enjoy this time with your new bundle of joy!!!
And may I say squee again!!! ^_^
September 15th, 2008 at 9:20 pm
Congratulations!
September 15th, 2008 at 9:22 pm
Congratulations!
September 15th, 2008 at 9:25 pm
awww, congrats =)
September 15th, 2008 at 10:08 pm
Welcome JoCo Jr.! Your dad rocks!
If it helps to know this, number two was the most difficult adjustment. Any that come after this, it’s just another plate at the table. (In a good way, of course.)
September 15th, 2008 at 11:36 pm
Congratulations! Two’s a magic number. Wishing you all the best.
September 16th, 2008 at 12:15 am
Congratulations! Enjoy the teeny-tiny fall-asleep-on-your-chest stage while you can.
(As you’ve already rebuilt yourself once, you’ll notice that the upgrade to 2.1 is easier than 2.0 but the sleep deprivation is worse the second time around (after all you’ve likely been shortchanged for the better part of the past 3 yearzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz….)
September 16th, 2008 at 12:22 am
Congrats.
September 16th, 2008 at 2:01 am
congrats… and good luck!
September 16th, 2008 at 2:46 am
Congratulations! And also, please extend congratulations to Dr. Martin, would you?
September 16th, 2008 at 3:02 am
Congrats!
September 16th, 2008 at 3:50 am
congratulations!!!!! glad to see the robots are increasing in numbers…
September 16th, 2008 at 4:01 am
Congratulations! You brave, brave man…
September 16th, 2008 at 7:22 am
Congratulations, Jonathan and Mrs. Jonathan; –and best wishes!
Please post a baby pic when you have a moment!
September 16th, 2008 at 7:53 am
Welcome, little one!
And congrats to the whole family – especially your little girl who is now a big sister
^_^
September 16th, 2008 at 8:03 am
Congratulations on being a father again!
But, um, does your wife know yet?!
September 16th, 2008 at 8:15 am
congratulations!
your kids have big shoes to fill, and i wish you and yours all the best in the world.
September 16th, 2008 at 8:28 am
CONGRATS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
September 16th, 2008 at 8:50 am
I can only assume he ruined everything… in the nicest way….
de-do,d0oo-de-dum, do-de-dum, do-de-dum, do.
Oh, and please wait to feed him the J’obama koolaid until he’s at least walking age.
September 16th, 2008 at 9:04 am
Congratulations!
September 16th, 2008 at 9:29 am
If you had waited one more day we could have shared a birthday, haha
September 16th, 2008 at 9:44 am
Congratulations!
September 16th, 2008 at 9:48 am
Yesssssss, we are one step closer to a world of Coultons. Congrats on the baby!
September 16th, 2008 at 10:34 am
Congrats!
September 16th, 2008 at 10:36 am
Aw, great news! Congratulations!
September 16th, 2008 at 10:42 am
Sweet!!! Congrats to you and the rest of the fam!!
September 16th, 2008 at 10:43 am
Congrats on the new little one!!! You’re now *officially* a parent. You only get “parent” credit with *two* or more because now the REAL parenting begins. Before you always KNEW who put Elmo in the toilet. Now you’ll have to be a detective, mediator, and spy.
)
Hugs,
Shell (mom to 3 boys and a girl)
September 16th, 2008 at 10:56 am
My best wishes to you and your family! Did you have to pay off your daughter with a ridiculously extravagant gift like we did when our 2nd son was born? (as though a new brother isn’t enough, sheesh!)
September 16th, 2008 at 11:02 am
Congratulations!! I’m a few weeks away from the arrival of my own wrinkly, tiny human. Dr. Martin does good work indeed. Thanks for referring him!
September 16th, 2008 at 11:03 am
L’chaim!
September 16th, 2008 at 11:21 am
Wow, I’m slow and behind the curve, as usual, but Congratulations from our family to yours!
Soon you’ll be needing a minivan. And you’ll have to write a song about that.
September 16th, 2008 at 12:35 pm
Whoa! Major congrats, JoCo.
September 16th, 2008 at 12:38 pm
Congratulations, sir.
September 16th, 2008 at 12:41 pm
Still snickering at JoCo 2.0. CLEVER.
Congratulations, and I am envious. In an I’m-really-glad-I-don’t-have-a-baby-again-but-babies-are-neat kind of way.
September 16th, 2008 at 1:05 pm
Many many congratulations, Jon. Nice work!
September 16th, 2008 at 1:27 pm
100th!
Also, congrats.
September 16th, 2008 at 2:02 pm
+1 congratulations
I know you want to keep your family out of things as much as possible, but it would be nice if you told us your children’s (and your wife’s) names. It’s always “my wife” or “my daughter” and (now, probably) “my son.” Just seems a bit impersonal. Would be nice to be able to put as
September 16th, 2008 at 2:02 pm
+1 congratulations
I know you want to keep your family out of things as much as possible, but it would be nice if you told us your children’s (and your wife’s) names. It’s always “my wife” or “my daughter” and (now, probably) “my son.” Just seems a bit impersonal. Would be nice to be able to put a name to an identification.
September 16th, 2008 at 2:39 pm
Congratulations!
September 16th, 2008 at 3:04 pm
Wow, congradulations! That’s awesome, man!
September 16th, 2008 at 3:16 pm
huh. i had apparently not web stalked you properly. congratulations on: your new son, your first child, and your marriage or at least somewhat serious relationship.
September 16th, 2008 at 3:52 pm
…also congratulations on your losing your virginity, your adolescence, learning to walk & speak, and your birth.
man, i should really pay closer attention!
September 16th, 2008 at 5:54 pm
Re: JoCo 2.0
I was thinking 2.2
or perhaps 2.1.1 ?
whatever. congrats.
September 16th, 2008 at 6:03 pm
Congratuations! Pleased to hear everyone is happy and healthy!
September 16th, 2008 at 8:33 pm
Mazel Tov!
September 16th, 2008 at 8:37 pm
Congrats!
Also do you realize how many comments there are here compared to the last post? Well now all you need to know when you’re hungry for comments is to mention is Coulton Junior(s).
September 16th, 2008 at 10:57 pm
Grats, Jonathan. I wish you all the very best. =]
September 16th, 2008 at 10:59 pm
Congrats, man! (and give your wife an atta-girl, as well!)
September 17th, 2008 at 12:33 am
Congratulations Jonathan! I give you my best wishes as well; take all the time off you need.
September 17th, 2008 at 2:12 am
So happy to hear of your newest creation! I wish a full and entertaining life for you and all your family! Hope he gets your creativity and your hair.
I say take the whole year off if you want – family comes first. Plus, I know you’d have tons of inspiration after that anyway.
So, dunno if it’s proper to ask, but what’s his name!?!
September 17th, 2008 at 3:41 am
Congratulations to your spouse and you on successful delivery of project Coulton:TNG.2!
September 17th, 2008 at 3:43 am
Re order of mention in previous:
“Maternity is a matter of fact; paternity is a matter of opinion.”
Just saying.
Well done to both of you!
September 17th, 2008 at 6:39 am
Congratulations!!
September 17th, 2008 at 10:09 am
Hey man, congrats on your child
September 17th, 2008 at 11:09 am
Grats man! Take a good long leave
September 17th, 2008 at 12:55 pm
Congratulations!
Methinks that going through with your “The Audacity of Jokes” performance makes you neither dedicated professional nor irresponsible father: but something better than either: dedicated father. Doing what you can to bring about a better country for your newest arrival to grow up in.
September 17th, 2008 at 1:39 pm
Congratulations to you and your wife on being ruined again!
September 17th, 2008 at 2:04 pm
Congratulations on your newest little addition! I’ve got a couple of little ones myself (all girls so far, but I’m in the process of growing another one to make his/her debut this coming spring).
Hope you have plenty of time to enjoy that tiny baby phase while it lasts.
September 17th, 2008 at 2:26 pm
Mazel Tov!
September 17th, 2008 at 2:58 pm
Congratulations, but you left out his name and JoCo 2.0 gets old fast.
September 17th, 2008 at 4:04 pm
Congratulations all round!
September 17th, 2008 at 5:40 pm
Congratulations to you and your wife! Did you give him a name?
September 17th, 2008 at 5:43 pm
Man you weren’t even showing last time I saw you. I bet you get your girlish figure back in no time.
September 17th, 2008 at 7:10 pm
Wow, CONGRATS, Jonathan!! That’s such great news. Best to you and your growing family.
September 17th, 2008 at 7:15 pm
Many, many congratulations!! That’s wonderful news.
Also — you did an Obama benefit???? My respect for you has somehow, impossibly, gotten higher. Seriously, dude, I didn’t know there was a “higher” to go to!
September 17th, 2008 at 8:19 pm
Whee, bravo and congratulations from Australia.
September 17th, 2008 at 8:21 pm
OK, Andy Baio’s wish was my command: Re: Your Brains, The Lullaby.
September 17th, 2008 at 10:15 pm
Congrats to you and me. Always glad when it isn’t mine.
September 17th, 2008 at 10:39 pm
Congratulations!
So, does he have his own monkey butler yet?
September 17th, 2008 at 11:12 pm
Very cute, Rob! I think you may need to talk to your short colleague about upstaging, though. =D
September 18th, 2008 at 3:14 am
Congratulations Jonathan (and family)!!!!
Post baby pics?
September 18th, 2008 at 9:21 am
Congratulations!
My kids want your kids to know that their dad writes funny funny stuff!
September 18th, 2008 at 12:11 pm
Congratulations to you and your family, Jonathan!! We’ll be here!
September 18th, 2008 at 4:39 pm
Well wishes to the whole family.
And I just wanted to again thank you for your song “You Ruined Everything”.
It was the most accurate portrayal of the mixed feelings involved in having your first kid that I encountered in all my studies.
September 18th, 2008 at 9:17 pm
Either I haven’t been following the blog closely enough, or this came completely out of the blue. Holy unexpectedness, Batman!
Congrats, and here’s hoping that your wife and JoCoJunior are both doing fine!
September 18th, 2008 at 10:08 pm
Wow, Fantastic!! Congrats!
I join your other fans in clamoring for celebrity baby pictures. Although we will not fault you for waiting till after the little one has uncrumpled a bit
September 19th, 2008 at 12:11 pm
Wow, congratulations to the whole family! “A Better Version of You” should explain the situation to the older girl quite nicely.
September 19th, 2008 at 12:31 pm
Congratulations, and best wishes for you and your growing family, Jonathan!
Now, when do tickets for Dr. Coulton’s 100% Natural Good Time Family Band Solution go on sale?
September 20th, 2008 at 8:50 am
Many congratulations to you and your family
September 20th, 2008 at 5:27 pm
Congratulations John!
September 20th, 2008 at 9:32 pm
Congrats! My wife and I are expecting our first in January…a girl.
We’re really happy…and I’m terrified out of my mind.
September 21st, 2008 at 11:12 am
Congratulations to you and your family ;D
” And they lived happily ever after ” =)
September 21st, 2008 at 1:33 pm
Congrats! I’m sure he’ll be writing songs about zombies and dinosaurs in no time.
September 21st, 2008 at 4:13 pm
Congrats, man! What about the name?
September 22nd, 2008 at 2:35 am
Wonderful news! Enjoy the time when they’re this little and can’t break your stuff yet.
Obama? I figured since you are smart you’d be a McCain man. Having kids will make you more conservitive. I have four and am part of the vast rightwinged conspiracy now.
September 22nd, 2008 at 5:26 pm
Major congratulations man! Lucky kid, who could ask for a better role model?
September 23rd, 2008 at 11:54 am
Congrats are in order! Now the fun begins anew
September 25th, 2008 at 11:04 am
Congrats on little number 2. Very cool. My husband and I are debating that very subject right now and probably will be until I actually go off the pill
So thought I would see if you want to play my 2 year old birthday party in January. You can bring the whole family to Chicago for a little vacation. It would be a blast. Trust me, we aren’t crazy, just fans. Well, maybe we are a littel crazy.
Congrats again – Jess
September 25th, 2008 at 4:17 pm
congratulations coultons one and all !
September 27th, 2008 at 3:16 pm
Congratulations!I wish you and your family helth,luck in life as in your career and lots and lots of love!
December 1st, 2008 at 11:37 pm
nice! more Coultons in this world… definitely a great thing… keep it coming