Flagrantly Wrong or Unmitigated

Deane sends me this thesaurusized version of the opening of Baby Got Back (as inspired by Chris Falvey on McSweeney’s):

Oh my supernatural being, Becky, look at her fleshy mounds above her legs
it is so extensive
She appears to be one of those spoken rhyming vocals guys romantic and/or sexual involvement
Who can explain the nature of those spoken rhyming vocal guys?
They only converse with her because she has the appearance of a somebody who receives money in return for sexual intercourse

I mean her fleshy mounds
It’s just so extensive
I can’t believe her fleshy mounds are so round
Suspended over there
I mean, it’s flagrantly wrong or unmitigated
Look, she’s just so belonging to an ethnic group with dark skin

I enjoy big fleshy mounds and I cannot say something that is untrue to deceive you
You other brothers can’t refuse to acknowledge
That when a girl walks in with an extremely small physical length around her stomach
And a globular thing in the front of your human head
You become more likely to move rapidly upward or forward in a series of rapid movements