Tomorrow night Phoenix. Saturday San Diego. Sunday Los Angeles.

I could use some help with selling CDs and shirts in both Phoenix and LA. You will receive a free ticket and a bear hug from either Paul or Storm (in addition, I or one of my assistants will wave at you from my private zeppelin as I float high above you and sip champagne through a caviar straw). If you’re interested, email me through that Contact link up there.

See you soon…

“Last week I left a note on Laura’s desk…I love her…”

I am, of course, Morimoto.

Sign up if you would like to match wits…

Of course I don’t have any shots of Molly performing with us, because we were all too busy singing our hearts out to work the camera. Certainly better footage of that already exists anyway, just ask the YouTubes.

Thanks everyone for another great couple of shows. This week is resting week for old JoCo, which means upgrading Wordpress, accounting, maybe a little Halo 3. And of course I’ll be preparing for the next stretch of shows at the end of next week, which is Phoenix, San Diego and LA.

In the meantime, maybe you should read the blog of a real rock star, John Roderick of The Long Winters, who is so rock and roll that he is missing a front tooth.

I’m going to start by selling them on CafePress and see how things go, I may eventually end up finding a place to print them so I can sell them at shows. I’ve just ordered one of each for myself so I can see how they look, but at this point you should know the final product is unseen. I can vouch for the excellence of the artwork, but not the ultimate overall shirt quality, you see what I’m saying.

Thanks again to all the entrants and winners: this was big fun.

Tonight, Madison.

In the meantime, please enjoy this video of Ian doing the 51 state songs from Hodgman’s audiobook (honestly, I don’t remember any of these).

Also, a longer version of the Giant Donut Incident exists, but I will leave that for Paul and Storm to post and discuss.

Tom Cruise Crazy (with Molly on uke and singing, the rest of us doing our best to keep up):

My Monkey (with Molly on uke, me on Tenori-On, and all FOUR of us on vocals):

Friday April 25 at 8 PM
Mission Theater (Portland, OR) with Paul and Storm
Tickets: http://xrl.us/bjp9g

Saturday April 26 at 8 PM
Triple Door (Seattle, WA) with Paul and Storm
SOLD OUT!

Sunday April 27 at 8 PM
Triple Door (Seattle, WA) with Paul and Storm
If not sold out already, it will be soon!
Tickets: http://xrl.us/bjqah

Thursday May 1 at 7 PM
Varsity Theater (Minneapolis, MN) with Paul and Storm
Tickets: http://xrl.us/bjp9r

Friday May 2 at 7 PM
Majestic Theater (Madison, WI) with Paul and Storm
Tickets: http://xrl.us/bjp9t

Saturday May 3 at 7:30 PM
Lakeshore Theater (Chicago, IL) with Paul and Storm
Tickets: http://xrl.us/bjp9z

Thursday May 15 at 7 PM
Brickhouse Theater (Phoenix, AZ) with Paul and Storm
Tickets: http://xrl.us/bjp93

Saturday May 17 at 9 PM
Lestat’s Coffee House (San Diego, CA) with Paul and Storm
Tickets at the door only: http://www.lestats.com

Sunday May 18 at 9 PM
House of Blues Sunset Strip (Los Angeles, CA) with Paul and Storm
Tickets: http://xrl.us/bjp95 (on sale 4/24)

Saturday June 21 at 7:30 PM
Highline Ballroom (NYC) with Paul and Storm
Tickets: http://xrl.us/bjp97

And that’s the news so far - Lots of other stuff in the works though,
including a return trip to the UK sometime in October, and the release
of the concert DVD sometime in the Fall. More details and updated
information can be found on my shows page
(http://jonathancoulton.com/shows). As always, I have probably made
mistakes, so please check my work before you buy tickets.

And you know what? Take the rest of the day off, it’s really nice
outside.

Thanks to Agent Lex, Bry, and MitchO (plus all the other contributors who also rock) for all their hard work getting this thing up and running. More hard work remains, for there are plenty of informations to be wikified.

Why not take a look?

This does not mean that I don’t love you. In fact, I did it BECAUSE I love you. See, there was an enormous pile of unanswered emails, some of which were almost a year old, and it was making me sad. Will I ever write another song (I would ask myself)? Not while I have all these emails to answer! And to be perfectly honest, I was writing enough similar responses that it made sense to start using Text Expander to save time on the stuff I was typing over and over. And then Merlin Mann was all “You mean you’re not using Mail Template?” and so I had to start using that. So you see, the process was already corrupt to some extent (because of Merlin Mann, in case I haven’t made that clear).

Now it sounds like I’m making excuses, and I guess I am. But I will continue to read everything that comes in, and I will attempt to respond personally to as much of it as I can. And just because Scarface is pulling the switch that makes the “thank you” email go out, please don’t think I mean it any less. I just don’t have the time to pull that switch AND write the music anymore. A wonderful problem to have, to be sure, but a problem nonetheless.

I hope the internet can forgive me.

An Easy Choice, originally uploaded by jcoulton.

What, no “Lotsa-Poo?”

This really works, it’s the only reason I had any confidence that London would be a well-attended show. So if you haven’t already, add your name to a demand in the place you’d like to see me play, and that will help me plan the trip.

Fly monkeys, fly!

In a related story, here’s an interview I did with Heather Wilson at Harmonix, the makers of Rock Band.

Also, just wanted to let you know, I’m quitting music because I just got a great job writing software.

Next week I will rest, but this week I continue to bring the noise and funk. To wit:

Wednesday April 2 at 7:30 PM
World Cafe Live (Philadelphia, PA) with Paul and Storm
Tickets here: http://tinyurl.com/2tgqrb

Thursday April 3 at 7 PM
Iron Horse Music Hall (Northampton, MA) with Paul and Storm
Tickets here: http://www.iheg.com/iron_horse_main.asp

And then something at Northeastern on Saturday, but that’s not open to the public. Tough luck, public!

More bad news here.

Lesson two from SuperDave - The Future Soon and Lesson three - I Feel Fantastic. Also, Dave has set up a site and a feed especially for these lesson videos.

For Cactus Cafe attendees - Michael Wood blogs about as well as he does a robot voice (and using the same words). I kid because I love! Michael Wood and Andy Bates should have a throw down someday.

RIT’s Surround Sound does Chiron Beta Prime and Still Alive a cappella.

A Code Monkey remix from Miko Squirrel.

Video of a Valentines Day pony-monkey massacre.

The same, but a photo of a cookie.

Still Alive in Mario Paint Composer.

The Portal Cake - for reals!

From long ago (this is getting embarrassing, we’re back before VALENTINE’S DAY here people), Ze Frank and me and lots of other people have this interesting discussion about creativity humunculi.

—————————————

And now, the stuff that IS interviews with me:

Me guesting on The Geoff Show podcast for Virgin Radio in London, I guess yesterday? What day is it?

An interview with me on the Technology and the Arts Podcast.

A text Q&A session with StuffWeLike.

A BBC Radio interview I did while I was at SXSW.

An interview with the Geekspeak podcast.

An interview - hey, video! - with TV Week, also from SXSW.

Me on episode one of the newly launched SMTV with the lovely and talented Samantha Murphy.

My interview with the Wired GeekDad blog.

I’m at Gatwick right now eating sausage and preparing to return to my homeland, the United States of America. See you tomorrow Atlanta - bring your A game…

1) Untitled by Tindomiel Muinamir
2) Jonathan Coulton T-Shirt Design by Tony Harsh
3) Untitled by Demetrius
4) Maybe I’m Amazing by Jeremy Dwiggins
5) I Crush Everything by the multi-talented Andy Bates

I’m going to start looking into printing options now, and possibly make them available on CafePress as well. There are plenty of great ones that didn’t make the top five too, so we’ll have to see what to do about that.

As per the contest rules, all five of those folks will get a signed copy of the Thing a Week Box, plus downloads of the entire JoCo catalog in their format of choice. And the big winner, Tindomiel Muinamir, gets a signed iPod Nano preloaded with all songs. Congratulations to the winners (I’ll be in touch to get some details from you) and many thanks to everyone who entered.

I can tell you now though that the London show has somehow, impossibly, sold out. There will be some small number of standing room tickets at the door, but if you don’t make to this one I’ll be back soon. Apparently there’s an audience over there. Who knew?

Thanks for you patience. More soon.

Worst Gig Ever, originally uploaded by jcoulton.

Someone entertaining all the wifi leeches at the Dell Lounge. Egads. Still haven’t attended a single panel here at SXSW, which makes me either very smart or very stupid. I’ll let you know as soon as I figure it out..

In case you were not at the Birchmere, and in case you didn’t get a chance to jam a camera in your pocket, then go up on stage and steal focus from Paul and Storm during their song “Nugget Man,” here is what that’s like:

Subcribe to Dave’s YouTube channel if you’d like to stay on top of things.

Assume conservatively that your True Fans will each spend one day’s wages per year in support of what you do. That “one-day-wage” is an average, because of course your truest fans will spend a lot more than that. Let’s peg that per diem each True Fan spends at $100 per year. If you have 1,000 fans that sums up to $100,000 per year, which minus some modest expenses, is a living for most folks.

One thousand is a feasible number. You could count to 1,000. If you added one fan a day, it would take only three years. True Fanship is doable. Pleasing a True Fan is pleasurable, and invigorating. It rewards the artist to remain true, to focus on the unique aspects of their work, the qualities that True Fans appreciate.

Amen.

Kevin’s apparently what they call a “smart person” - I didn’t link to it because I was too slow, but a couple of posts ago was this excellent piece on what you can still sell when everything is free.

The show at Dingwalls has been confirmed and tickets are now being sold right here. At this point I’m just waiting to find out if this other secret thing is going to pay for my flight or not - I sure hope it is, otherwise I’m buying a last minute transatlantic ticket.

I don’t know if it’s 14+ or 18+, there seems to be some confusion. Also not sure who “special guests” are or if there are any. I’ll see what I can find out and let you know. Either way, Bob’s your uncle! Apples and pears! Am I right?

But for now: dance, monkey.

There’s something else that needs to come together that will get me over the ocean on an airplane, and if that happens then the London show is a go. I hope to have ticket links and show time specifics in the next day or so, but the venue is going to be Dingwalls.

This is a real test of Eventful, and the power of the internet blah blah blah. There are 159 people demanding me in London, if most of them buy tickets we should be in pretty good shape. But the capacity at Dingwalls is 487, so there’s plenty of room for everyone, ha ha ha.

More soon! London! Holy crap!

This will only make sense to you if you were at the San Francisco show (or if you have a time machine and have already watched the DVD).

Fair warning, it’s essentially an hour of talking about me (and niche broadcasting), which I always enjoy, but which you may have had enough of by now. Thanks Leo!

But I must tell you all, it was a fantastic show on Friday night. Many thanks to everyone who made it happen: Adam and Jeremiah from Lucas Blank, the awesome crowd, the dedicated crew, the fan cameras, the tireless PAs, the fantastic Great American Music Hall folks, the cake bearers, the Paul and Storm, the Kristen Shirts, Leo, Merlin and Veronica, my new friends at Harmonix (big, mad, ridiculous props to you), etc. I’m not always comfortable asking for help, and I had to do an awful lot of it for this thing - you all came through and made it a really great night.

Hopefully I’ll get to watch some of this footage this week and we’ll have an idea what we’ve got to work with. Don’t know how long it’s going to be before I have something to show you, but it’s likely a final product won’t be ready for months. I’ll certainly post progress updates here. I can’t wait either!

Thank you one and all.

2) I played a short set at the Valve party last night, which closed with me playing “Still Alive” in the game Rock Band with a bunch of Harmonix folks. Yeah, it WAS awesome, you’re right. Plus I got 95% accuracy on the vocals. I guess the secret is out now - the song is going to be available for download in the game sometime in the future (don’t ask when because I don’t know).

3) I can’t remember the other thing. I’m so tired. Oh right, I was on CNET Live today and that was pretty awesome too - they even gave me burritos to eat! If you missed it when it was live, watch it here. Everyone here on the west coast is so nice and their burritos so tasty, maybe I don’t really hate California at all. Maybe I love California.

I’m not just saying that because I have a show here tomorrow night. OK, maybe I am.

Not for nothing, but his new, fantastic book is called “More Than it Hurts You” and it comes out in June.

Happy Valentines Day, originally uploaded by jcoulton.

My coffee shop/morning office seconds that emotion.

Also, the book she’s referring to is called “The Diary of an Old Soul & The White Pages Poems,” it is here on Amazon, and appears to involve her having written a poem for every day of the year. Poem a day, song a week, I ask you: coincidence?

Let me be clear about a couple of things:

1) I wanted to run a contest, not because I wanted to get free design work, but because I wanted to get a design that comes from, and is ratified by the community here on this site. I think it’s fun when fans get involved - it’s the same reason I got people to send in hand claps for “We Will Rock You” and why I held a solo contest for “Shop Vac.” That was fun, right? Right?

2) I have no idea how much it would cost to commission someone to design a shirt for me, certainly it would depend on who it was and what they and I thought their work was worth. But for the record, it’s going to cost me $200 for the iPod, maybe 50 bucks in raw materials for Thing a Week Box Sets, a few bucks for shipping, and probably a few nights sleep while I worry about this whole affair and read a bunch of flamey comments. After all that, I’m not sure I’ll end up with any designs that I want to print (in which case just having had the contest will have been worth it to me). Honestly T-shirts are not a huge profit center for me, in fact, they’re just barely less trouble than they’re worth.

3) Another quote: “[H]oly cow, JoCo is going to get an assload of free design work that is only going to cost him a single iPod, and on top of that, he might use anyone’s submission without them winning anything.” Yes, that is what I said, I can see how that last part is not really fair, and in fact it seems to be against the rules at Pixish: “…publishers have no rights to your work if you don’t win.” So I’ll change that. Only the winning design may be printed.

4) I admit this is not the first time I’ve felt a little weird about getting free work from fans - I’ve got helpers working on this video shoot for comp tickets (or not, if they already had tickets), many fans who have sold merch in exchange for comps and free merch, website work from Kerrin, illustrations from Len, forum moderation from Bry, music videos from all sorts of people, not to mention the free handclaps I tricked the internet into giving me. And I’m not the only one getting free stuff from the internet: Amazon gets book reviews, YouTube gets videos, MySpace gets, erm, error messages. But seriously, where do you draw the line?

Anyway, this whole thing was supposed to be fun, but it’s feeling a lot less fun now that the internet thinks I’m some kind of Web 2.0 plantation owner. I myself am pretty sure this contest is way different from me asking a bunch of designers to do spec work for me, and I’m also not comfortable deciding that Pixish is evil just because it can be used that way. But I am curious to hear what you all think (and folks from the Metafilter thread if they find their way here - I was going to sign up and post a comment, but it costs $5). If I’m wrong, I’ll call the whole thing off. Then I’ll just buy an iPod and smash it in the street, I don’t care, I’m rich.

One of the nice things about being a father is the opportunity to watch Mister Rogers again. I have such fond memories of the show from when I was a kid, and watching it still makes me all happy and fuzzy inside. It’s just so great. Fred Rogers was a genius and a saint and probably a space alien from the planet Love, Johnny Costa can make pianos play just by thinking about them - the whole thing is so mellow and pleasant and awesome. If opium were a TV show, it would be Mr. Rogers’ Neighborhood.

But watching it again for the first time in many years, I was reminded how much I loved (I should say: LURVED) Lady Aberlin. I always picture her in this one particular blue dress with flowers on it, I have no idea if it’s a muumuu. But she’s pretty and has a pretty voice and she’s so nice to little Daniel Striped Tiger. I’m getting all flushed just thinking about it. This song is sort of a love song to her, by way of that dress.

Lady Aberlin’s Muumuu

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Chords and lyrics