Jonathan Coulton

I was going to apologize for all of these postings being about me. But guess what, it’s my website. It has my name on it. I mean, what did I think I was doing when I set it up? Regardless, here is my new favorite blog posting about me:

The Mighty Kymm

in which the author wonders about why my website includes no photos of me. She speculates that either I am a complete troll, or I am so gorgeous that it my looks would be a distraction from my music, and suspects the latter. Well, she’s right. Ask anyone who knows what I look like, I’m a total babe. (As long as you like beards. Er, and the goiter.)

I should point out that my first CD, Smoking Monkey, does include a picture of me standing in front of one of the dishes at the Very Large Array radio telescope thing in New Mexico. I am backlit, so the goiter doesn’t really show.

I will also note that The Mighty Kymm has hand-coded her site in html, which is hott.

Hooray, hooray, it’s the first of May. Spend it with someone you love…

Some of you have asked for the answer to the mystery of my high ranking: whether I made a ton of money, or nobody goes to mp3tunes. Well, the numbers are in, and I am now extremely wealthy. Tens of people bought my mp3s last month, and at .65 a pop, well, you do the math. I’m nearly a hundredaire, and I now occupy three slots out of the top ten song list. Thanks to all of you who took the plunge and dropped a buck, I really do appreciate the support. If you haven’t bought yet, why don’t you just stab me in the neck instead? Because it would hurt me less…

I didn’t write this one, it’s a cover of a Destiny’s Child song. I don’t usually do covers, but the lyrics to this song are so freaking hilarious, and it’s been stuck in my head since the first time I heard its delicious groove on the FM radio. I’m not totally happy with the mix, but it’s probably not wise for me to mess with it anymore, so it will just have to do. Check out the banjo and the highly danceable remix section.

I don’t know if posting a cover like this is illegal or not, I’m kind of hoping for at least a cease and desist letter. I always like to hear from fans/haters, so please let me know what you think.

Now this is fun. MP3Tunes.com is one of the online music stores that carries my stuff, and I was just checking my ranking in the various charts, which is something I do every couple of minutes. If you want to see an example of complete domination of a teeny tiny niche that nobody wants a piece of anyway, go there and click the Top Songs button. Then click the Pop genre. Then click the Quirky sub-genre. At this writing, I occupy 14 out of the 15 top spots. Either sales are going crazy and I’m going to get a big check in the next couple of months, or nobody’s using MP3Tunes to buy music. You should be able to guess which one I’d prefer – if you have a moment, and 88 cents, why not buy a song or two? Then email it to someone you love.

Now, I know the iTunes store is great and it integrates really nicely with the iPod you all have, but think for a second. When you buy a song from the iTunes store, it’s in a format that restricts how you use that song. You can only play it on devices that support that super secret format, and you can only play it on a certain number of computers. Maybe this doesn’t present a problem for you because you only listen to music on the iPod. Or maybe you think it’s OK to have to spend a few minutes burning a CD and then ripping it to mp3 again so you can get the music to play on your mp3 streamer device or whatever. But you paid for that song. It’s your 88 cents and it’s your damn song and you should be able to do whatever you want with it. That’s why we all need to show MP3Tunes a little love…